


Sing for the Moment

by HPFandom_archivist



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Alternate Universe, Angst, First Time, M/M, Sexual Content, Slash sex, Tragedy
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2007-06-05
Updated: 2007-06-04
Packaged: 2018-09-30 06:33:14
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,976
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10156280
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/HPFandom_archivist/pseuds/HPFandom_archivist
Summary: Sirius is struggling to deal with James' marriage to Lily. However, he seems to find some relief in Remus.Pairings: James/Sirius, Sirius/RemusDisclaimers: I own none of teh HP characters or the the lyrics to "Weak in the Knees". I only decided to play with them.





	1. Weak in the Knees

**Author's Note:**

> Note from SeparatriX, the archivist: this story was originally archived at [HP Fandom](http://fanlore.org/wiki/HP_Fandom_\(archive\)), which was closed for health and financial reasons. To preserve the archive, I began manually importing its works to the AO3 as an Open Doors-approved project in August 2016. I e-mailed all creators about the move and posted announcements, but may not have reached everyone. If you are (or know) this creator, please contact me using the e-mail address on [HP Fandom collection profile](http://archiveofourown.org/collections/hpfandom/profile).

_Would you mind if I pretended  
We were somewhere else?_

Here they were once more in a cramped broom closet, exchanging needy kisses and desperate touches. Sirius would kill to have James in a real bed...kill to feel those kisses while surrounded with warmth and satin.

_Doing something we wanted to?_

Sirius wished they could have sex for once. No more of these kisses and blow jobs. He wanted to be inside his lover. Why wouldn’t James be with him? Why couldn’t they rent a hotel room even once?

_Cause I’ll this living makes me want to do  
Is die cause I can’t live with you_

“I need you. I need to be with you. Leave her. We can run away.”  
“It would never work.”  
“But I need you with me!”  
“I am with you.” James said, laying his hand upon his lover’s chest. “I’m always right here.”

_And you don’t even care_

“So you’ll be at the wedding?” James said, pushing the tender moment away as fast as it had happened. Didn’t he realize it was killing Sirius to have to stand and watch James marry the woman who was pushing a wedge between them?

_Would you mind if I pretended  
I was someone else?_

So, Sirius would stand as James’ best man, acting as if he was nothing more than an old and dear friend. Nothing more than a brother. Nothing more than...nothing.

_With courage in love and war?_

In rehearsal, James was glowing, as was Lily. Every time she looked at Sirius he could see in her eyes that she knew. He could also see the satisfaction that she knew she had won. 

_I used to think that’s what I was  
But now this lying hurts to much_

“How do I look?”  
“You don’t need to do this.”  
“Yes, I do.”  
“Reconsider.”  
“I can’t.”  
“You can. You just won’t. I need you.”  
“And I need you to do this for me today.”  
“It’s killing me James.”  
“Oh, stop being so foolish.”

_And I don’t know what for_

Sirius walked down the aisle, escorting one of Lily’s bridesmaids. Did he mean anything to James? Had any of it meant anything? Would James still love him? Did James even love him now?

_I’m weak in the knees for you_

Everyone’s eyes, including James’, were on Lily as she walked down the aisle. However, Sirius never looked away from James even once.

_But I’ll stand if you want me to_

He passed the wedding band to James, fighting against the urge to throw it to the floor.

_My legs are strong and I’ll move on_

Remus, who was standing next to Sirius at the bar during the reception, leaned over to whisper in Sirius’ ear. He wanted to know what Sirius was doing after the reception.

_But honey I’m weak in the knees_

He was watching James dance slowly with Lily as Remus whispered the question into his ear. It appeared that James was whispering in Lily’s ear as well.  
“I’m going to your place aren’t I?” Sirius asked, in response to Remus’ question.

_Would I mind if I walked over_  
And I kissed your face?  
In front of all of your friends? 

Remus had gone to the washroom when Sirius spied James talking to some of his work friends with Lily nowhere in sight. Sirius downed his seventh drink, and headed over. James jumped as Sirius laid his hand on the small of his back.  
“You look great in that suit.”  
“Are you drunk?”  
“Just celebrating your big day!” Sirius cried, planting a sloppy kiss on James’ cheek. James laughed awkwardly.  
“He’s had a little too much to drink,” he explained to his buddies.

_Would You mind if I got drunk and said  
I want to take you home to bed?_

The work friends’ laughed knowingly and went back to talking.  
“I want you,” Sirius said, leaning in close to James’ ear. “I have a room rented here. We could slip out. We could let on that you need to help me to my room because I am so drunk. I want you to fuck me, James. Now.”

_Oh would you change your mind?_

James looked at Sirius for a moment, then turned to his colleagues.   
“I’m going to help this fellow to his room. He’s had a little too much of the whiskey.”

_I’m weak in the knees for you_

Sirius is on his knees in the elevator, sucking James’ cock, both of them moaning loudly.

_But I’ll stand if you want me to_

James was tugging on the shoulder of Sirius’ suit, trying to pull him to his feet.  
“My room is closer,” he gasped as he re-buttoned his trousers. “Let’s go to my room.”

_My legs are strong and I’ll move on_

James had barely got the door unlocked and Sirius already had his own jacket and shirt off. James’ were off moments later and they were tumbling into James and Lily’s marital bed.

_But honey I’m weak in the knees_

Sirius is lying on his back, James kneeling above him lubing up his cock sloppily in his haste to be inside Sirius.

_I’m weak in the knees for you_

Sirius’ whole body was trembling in anticipation. He had waited so long for this.

_But I’ll stand if you want me to_

“Roll over,” James panted. “Get on your knees.” Sirius obeyed, even though he would have liked to stay right where he was. He felt James’ hands on his hips, James’ hardness pressing against him.

_My legs are strong and I’ll move on_

“I can’t” James whispered.  
“What? Why?”  
“Not tonight...not here. I can’t do it.” Sirius rolled over to look at James.  
“Are you insane?”  
“I can’t do this to Lily.”  
“What about what you’re doing to me?”  
“I can’t. I’m sorry, Sirius.”

_But honey I’m weak in the knees_

Sirius crawled out of the bed and shakily began to dress.  
“Sirius, I...” Sirius stumbled out into the hall, unsteady due to the alcohol and the way his mind was spinning. Then, there was Remus walking towards him.

_I’m weak in the knees for you_

Sirius grabbed the back of Remus’ neck, pulling him into a crushing kiss.  
“Where’s your room?” Sirius rasped.  
“Just down the hall.”  
“Let’s go.”

_But I’ll stand if you want me to_

Within moments they were both in Remus’ bed, naked and writhing in the soft cotton sheets. Remus was on his stomach and ready...ready for what Sirius had wanted only moments ago.

_My legs are strong and I’ll move on_

Sirius drove into Remus’ body, the heat and the tightness making his breath catch in his chest. Remus moaned, muffled by a pillow. Sirius groaned in response. Remus lifted onto his elbows, panting Sirius’ name. Sirius slowed his tempo, distracted by the voice of the man below him. Sirius gritted his teeth, and pressed his weight onto Remus, forcing him back onto his stomach, his face back into the pillow.

_But honey I’m weak in the knees_

With a final deep, guttural moan, Sirius collapsed onto the man underneath him. It was James’ back his was kissing, James’ hip he was caressing, but it wasn’t James’ voice under his chest.


	2. Mr.Brightside

  
Author's notes: Sirius and Remus are still living together, but the realationship with James still haunts his thoughts.  
Characters: Lily/James, Srius/Remus  
Disclaimer: I do not own any HP characters or the lyrics to "Mr.Brightside." I just played with them for my own warped purposes.  


* * *

_Coming out of my cage  
And I’ve been doing just fine_

It had been 14 months since the wedding and Sirius was adjusting quite well to domestic life with Remus.

_Gotta gotta be down  
Because I want it all_

He had a house, a job, a car and a wonderful lover. Hell, they even had a dog. He was even managing to maintain his friendship with James.

_It started out with a kiss  
How did it end up like this?_

That one kiss that one night had led to this. He had a wonderful companion, warm arms to snuggle into every night, a loving man to wake up beside every morning.

_It was only a kiss_

“Good night” Remus said softly, planting a bruising kiss on Sirius’ lips before rolling over and turning out the light. The man had no idea how seductive he was...

_It was only a kiss..._

Sirius turned onto his side and felt Remus crush in behind him, felt his lips brushing his shoulder.

_Now I’m falling asleep_  
And she’s calling a cab  
While he’s having a smoke  
And she’s taking a drag 

It was the same every night. James consumed his pre-sleep thoughts. Unfortunately, so did Lily. He always started out just thinking of James, but then Lily swooped in, throwing everything into shadow.

_Now they’re going to bed  
And my stomach is sick_

The thought of them in their marital bed, the thought of them making love...her moaning his name. Sirius’ head was spinning, he stomach was clenching and he was sweating.

_And it’s all in my head_

He snapped awake at Remus’ breath in his ear, Remus’ lips on his throat, Remus’ erection pressing against his thigh.

_But she’s touching his chest now_

Remus’ tongue on his nipple...Lily’s red nails dragging across James’ upper body.

_He takes off her dress now_

Remus was rolling his boxers off his hips...Lily’s skirt landing around her feet...

_Let me go_

Sirius choked on a sob, which Remus mistook as nothing more than a groan of ecstasy.

_And I just can’t look_

Sirius shook his head, trying to drive the images out. It was if he was sitting right there watching them...watching him kiss her breasts.

_It’s killing me_

Sirius lunged from their bed, knocking Remus aside in his haste to reach the bathroom. He was retching before his knees even hit the floor, his mind spinning and his stomach clenching.

_And taking control_

He clutched the wall, cold sweat running down his back, his heart pounding painfully in his chest. He needed to talk to James, needed to hear his voice...

_Jealousy  
Turning saints into the sea_

Pictures of James and Lily making love were still tearing though his brain. Remus came and leaned against the frame of the bathroom door, his stomach clenching as well. He knew what this was about.

_Turning through sick lullaby_

Sirius saw him out of the corner of his eye.  
“Supper’s not sitting well. Go back to bed.”  
“Anything else wrong?”  
“No. Just my stomach.”  
“Must be supper. My stomach doesn’t feel to well either,” Remus said bitterly.

_Choking on your alibi_

“You should go lay down, Remus.”  
“As should you.” He watched his partner, who wouldn’t meet his yes. “What else is going on?”  
“Nothing. Well...” Sirius’ mind was working fast. “Work. Work is hectic. It’s killing me. Lucius Malfoy is continually hanging over my shoulder.”  
“Alright then. Just come to bed.” Remus turned away, his throat clenching.

_But it’s just the price I pay_

Remus could hear Sirius retching again. He went back to lay in bed and wait, playing the part of the good mate. Sirius gritted his teeth, trying to get up from his knees. He needed to stop torturing himself.

_Destiny is calling me_

Remus made the bed, fluffing the pillows and putting everything back in order. Sirius stumbled out of the bathroom and downstairs.

_Open up your eager eyes_

Sirius’ eyes shot to the clock. He had to be up...he needed him to still be up. Remus hadn’t saw Sirius leave the bathroom, and he curled up in their cold bed to wait for his lover to come back.

_I’m Mr. Brightside_

Remus couldn’t wait to feel Sirius’ warm body pressed back against him.  
“Please pick up,” Sirius whispered. “Please pick up.”


End file.
